went to Hollywood cemetery today for a little spiritual reflection time. in a lot of ways it help to gain an understanding of why God is/isn't allowing things to occur in my life, but also simply reminding me that the only time I'm a decent communicator...is when I'm not around anyone. I haven't really ever had much confidence growing up when it comes to social skills....and I'm seeing that I still struggle...couldn't even come up with anything to say let alone what my favorite thing to do is...sadly I still don't know what I really enjoy doing....
see I don't understand how my heart breaks from the fact mr. Right hasnt graced me with his presence....when I'm so insecure when it comes to socializing...it would be easier if I actually had something of interest to talk about...but the only thing that is on my list of topics is my nephew...that's seriously unless the topic is about me and how I wish things were different in my life......I can't say the solution is "to get out more" cuz I'm still by myself....but then when I'm with ppl....how do I have a good time if I suck at talking???
Uh seriously enough with the low self-esteem!!!
Yeah....still feeling bummed...
~Lo out
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